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How to Care for Loved Ones with Dementia and Incontinence

Posted by Brianna Maguire on Sep 8th 2020

If you’re caring for someone with dementia and incontinence, know that you aren’t alone. Many people face incontinence as a result of dementia, especially during the later stages. The most important thing is making sure your loved one feels dignified and respected while you manage their incontinence.

Here’s our advice:

Respond Kindly

It’s important that your loved one feels supported and cared for. Respect their needs, and their concerns, and reassure them that there’s nothing wrong with having accidents. Some phrases we recommend are:

  • “Accidents happen to everyone”
  • “It isn’t your fault”
  • “This is completely normal”

Simulate the experience of wearing regular underwear

Sometimes, it can make things easier if your loved one just feels like they’re wearing regular underwear. Making simple changes to how you store and present products can make the transition to incontinence products much simpler. It’s helpful to:

  • Place the adult diapers with tabs or protective underwear wherever you typically store regular underwear, like a dresser drawer. This helps loved ones to feel like they’re wearing an item of clothing they’re used to.
  • Attach the tabs to the diaper before putting it on your loved one. That way, it’s just like stepping into regular underwear. After the product is on, readjust the straps for a tighter fit.
  • Make sure you pull the product out of the packaging and dispose of the packaging. That way, your loved one doesn’t need to see the pack of diapers at all.

Make home and lifestyle choices that support your loved one

There are certain environmental changes that can make a huge impact on your loved ones’ incontinence:

  • Make sure all pathways to the bathroom are clear, and that the bathroom is easy to find. Much of dementia incontinence is because loved ones can struggle to find a bathroom in time. Keep the bathroom visible, and the door open.
  • Some adults with dementia will have certain trigger phrases that mean they need to get to the restroom, so try to figure these out early. For example, “I need to find the lightswitch,” or “I can’t reach the remote” could actually mean, “I need to use the restroom.”
  • Consider using commodes, portable toilets that you can move from room to room

Find the right products

For family members with incontinence, finding the right products can be life-changing. Designed to keep your loved one dry, healthy, and comfortable, our incontinence products give both you and your loved ones the peace of mind you deserve.

Keep in mind that, in general, a tab-style brief is the best choice for people with dementia, since they’re the most absorbent and protective.

For loved ones with dementia, we recommend:

This diaper features a secure belt that holds onto the ultra-absorbent core, no matter where it’s attached. This means that if your loved one resists wearing a diaper, you can turn them, and fasten the diaper on the back. Has your loved one made it to the toilet, and you don’t want to use another diaper product? Just fasten the pad up off to the side, so your loved one can use the toilet, then secure the diaper back on to their body.

These underpads can be placed on any piece of furniture, like a bed, wheelchair, or couch. If your loved one “goes,” your furniture will be protected, and you can just throw the pad away -- no cleanup necessary.


By far the most absorbent adult diaper on the market, these keep your loved ones safe, dry, and protected. With a fully breathable core and a fast acquisition safe, you can protect your loved one's skin.

Lastly, remember: your loved ones mental and physical health is critical, but yours is too. Make sure you’re taking time for yourself, and look for products and services that are here to make your life easier.

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